Salute the sun

When it gets sunny I crave another way with connecting with my body, and I want that to be more of a meditative technique where I am leaving my thoughts at the door. It used to be running and then I got a knee injury and that had to change, and when I tried recently, Covid (wear your fucking mask btw) and knee injury aside, jogging was difficult as fuck! Not to say that yoga is any easier, however, yoga has been an idea that has entered mine yet again and I was wanting an addition or extension to my meditative practice. There are several types of yoga, and I am not going to list them here, but I do enjoy more of a flow or vinyasa yoga, where I am actively paying attention to my breathe going into a stretch or position. I tried yoga in my undergrad and tried again at the beginning of 2018, you know, goal setting and what not. I was met with some judgement, informed by the constructions of gender roles and such (yeah fuck those), and my own self criticism; not at all what a yoga practice should be. Honestly does someone do yoga and be like, hey I’m better at it then you are? If that is the case it’ll be a solo practice for me. 

*couch, cough* umm, social critique, disclaimer here. I want to note that yoga as a practice has been westernized and commercialized, and not to forgo its benefits I do want to critique and acknowledge that in our western society we really to take the sacredness of practices and ruin a lot of it. Just wanted to note that because while I want and intend to find the benefits of it, I don’t want to appropriate it too much to the point of clout; idk if I am using that term correctly lol.  In addition to that, western discourses have made it a kind of elitist, yoga studios cost an astronomical amount. I know people need to make a living but lets not make inaccessible. Another reason I have been hesitant to start yoga is because it can be kind of a sizest space, but that is most of any place in Southern California. *steps off box* 

When bending, stretching, and getting into pose that is attainable yet difficult; I was guided once to relate the pose as a difficult or rough time in my life. By paying attention to my breathe and remaking grounded in my body, as well as being kind to myself if I couldn’t hold or make the pose; that eventually with calm intention I would attain it, or I would go back to a pose that was more fitting  and comfortable, until I was ready to try again. While much of my practice I intend to keep my mind calm, it was such a cool thing to be able to work through some thoughts that were occupying some mental space. It was like performance of my anxiety and my hope of how I would want to attend to it. I am hoping that I am able to keep this up.